A Requiem for Sadness
by Justin-M-Bernard
Summary: Yes yes, a Wizard's War and such... But how will the survivrs cope? How will they find release for their pain? And how will it bring so many people together? Read and see...
1. I Remember You

**... _A Requiem for Sadness_ ...**

**- ****I -  
**

**I Remember You  
**

It started like any other year at Hogwarts, but that's where all similarities ended – it actually started.

In all likelihood, the school had changed more in the past year than it had in its entire history. The area had seen such destructive forces in the last year that classes had to be suspended for that whole year, essentially leaving a large gap in all of the academic studies held at the school. Those who helped rebuild took great care to preserve the school's history, while gently erasing away the signs of the battle.

The returning students solemnly filled the new Great Hall after the long respite from the castle. Most of the youths were silent. They compared what they saw now to what they remembered. Some only remembered the school's buildings and grounds as they should have been seen – unmolested from the tumultuous final moments of the Wizard's War. Some actually saw the resultant aftermath of Death Eaters attack and Voldemort's last stand, whether it was from the massive report put out by the wizarding press, or by actually taking part in the clean up and rebuilding of Hogwarts.

The strongest reactions came from a very small group. The few surviving students that remained as a testament of the larger group of dedicated students that took an active role in the school's defense along side their elders, and paid severely for it.

And then there were the teachers.

The current staff was consisted of all new members, save four individuals who now shouldered the respect and authority of the whole school, and perhaps even the whole wizarding world.

Professor Trelawney shocked everyone when she prophesied the Dark Lord's last attack – a mere three hours before it happened. She was so utterly shaken by the revelation that she was taken to St Mungo's under guard. By the time of her arrival, her mind had retreated deep into a coma, for which no remedy proved to be of use. She is in fact the only Hogwarts teacher to survive the war virtually unscathed aside from the ethereal Professor Binns. She remembers nothing of her vision or of her five month stay in Mungo's afterwards.

Madame Hooch was present. The flying instructor had assisted immensely by overseeing the battle and reporting its status to the Ministry of Magic. It was her swift eye and quick action that put her in that position. It also allowed her to evade a group of Death Eaters sent to kill her. She escaped alive – barely.

Severus Snape surprised everyone, and contributed monumentally to the defeat of Voldemort and his Death Eaters. Unbeknownst to all, he readily played the decoy that lured Lucius Malfoy, his wife, and a dozen other Death Eaters into a fatal trap moments before the Dark Lord made his final move. Once the evil leader was crippled, a window of opportunity appeared to finally strike him down.

No one truly remembers all the details of that terrible event. It's doubtful that anyone would want to. Dumbledore executed the final blow along side Harry. The method of attack used was an ancient spell that required an extreme cost, a cost that Dumbledore hadn't informed Harry until it was too late. That cost was the cherished wizened old man himself.

Minerva McGonagall had realized Dumbledore's strategy the instant the spell had been cast, and in the few moments from the spell's open to its close, she made a dramatic strike against Voldemort, keeping him unawares until the last second. Her life had paid the devastating price for victory in tandem with Dumbledore's.

Flitwick, Sprout, and Hagrid, also paid the ultimate consequence in the battle. Each of them played their part well, ensuring the survival of the others – their casualties unfortunate necessities of a war forced upon the wizarding world.

Harry ignored the looks from those of his fellow students that seemed aware enough of their surroundings to notice him. He quickly sat down among his fellow Gryffindors, and waited. He did not want to deal talking with people. Talking with people would mean talking about the war, _or_ talking about something else while trying to forget the war. Talking about the war would bring the painful memories back to the forefront of his mind, and that hurt too much. Forgetting what happened in the war, no matter how tempting that was, would also mean forgetting what happened to his best friends – and that would eat away at his insides until there was nothing left. Ron and Hermione had done a lot for him and their allies during the war. He could never forgive himself for disrespecting them like that. He'd rather die. In most cases, when he thought about it, he honestly _wanted_ to die.

Though, if anyone had a reason to die, it would be his two best friends. Ron had made several attempts after the decimation of his family. Only Ginny, and Percy survived, and barely at that! Percy lost both legs in the battle. Poor Ginny, had lost even more. She had survived miraculously when Death Eaters descended upon The Burrow. Witnessing the rape and massacre of her family had shocked most all of her sanity away. No one knows why she had remained untouched where she lay hidden. And yes, much to the overwhelming shock of anyone who heard of their fate, the men of her family had been raped alongside her mother.

When Ron had discovered his family's fate, he had lost all reason. He went missing for a day, and returned on death's door. At the last moment in his first suicide attempt he had changed his mind, but not soon enough to avoid irrevocable damage to himself. He tried twice more since then – unsuccessfully.

Hermione, hadn't faired much better. She had been kidnapped weeks prior to the final attack. No one knew her whereabouts, or her condition until after the war was won. Harry's best and most trusted friend had been subjected to starvation, shock treatment, invasive magic tampering with memory and mind. On top of that she had been broken by the dark lord himself, mentally, and physically – including rape.

All this to get to Harry.

In the face of adversity, the girl held strong. She managed to with hold as much information as she could, until the very end. Everyone congratulated her on her outstanding bravery and resolve. Harry was proud that she came through the ordeal the way she did, and how she carried herself in spite of what she experienced. It amazed him. He was convinced that Hermione had the strongest will one could have.

Both his best friends were doing much better now, though not well enough to make it today.

Harry's eyes briefly scanned the Great Hall. Within a heartbeat, his eyes locked with another's. Those grey eyes were filled with so much bittersweet sorrow; he almost forgot his own pain. Somewhere deep within Harry's being, looking into those eyes reminded him what a human soul was capable of. The details surrounding the other boy's defection were inconclusive at best. All that was known was from Snape who simply confirmed that it was the boy, and not himself, that triggered the trap that he'd set killing his parents and his two best friends in the process.

Harry Potter smiled a small knowing smile at the one boy who, in his opinion, had changed more than anyone else during the war – Draco Malfoy.

The blonde Slytherine stared blankly at the Gryffindor for a moment, then looking away suddenly as Hogwart's new Headmaster spoke to the hushed group of students for the first time.

* * *

September-15-2005: first posted 

September-21-2005: minor additions/changes, chapter name!

* * *


	2. It's In Our Hands

**... _A Requiem for Sadness_ ...**

**- ****II -  
**

**It's In Our Hands  
**

"Welcome." The silky voice spread across the group of students easily. The room was virtually silent to begin with. The new Headmaster was glad of this, he didn't feel well. It was more than just nerves, facing the body of students for the first time in his new position. Everyone questioned his appointment to this position, despite the Ministry's insistence that he should be honored for his contribution in the war. Even he questioned it.

"Welcome to Hogwarts." Snape began again. "Before we begin sorting the new students, I would like to address you all, students and teachers, regarding the overwhelming events of the past year." Some of the students looked apprehensive at the mention of this.

"No doubt some of you expected me to avoid this topic. However, I feel obligated to recognize the war out of respect and love of those who perished – on both sides." Many threw sharp looks at him. He had expected that, but he continued. "The Wizard's War, as it has become known, wreaked havoc on the whole wizarding world and even caused innumerable disturbances in that of muggles. It should not be ignored.

"It was once believed that this war could be avoided, that it was simply a matter of taking the right precautions, ensuring that Voldemort could be avoided and kept at bay." Some still reacted at the sound of the dark lord's name.

"I believe that this war was unavoidable. I also believe that the result was just as inescapable. I know that Voldemort was not planning to idly cower in the darkness waiting for the rest of us to forget about him to attack. No, his drive to conquer forced this war upon us, just as it forced us to defend what we held high and loved – just as it forced us to face him and finally deal with him the only way we could. By destroying him, or be destroyed while trying.

"This is precisely why the immense loss of loved ones, colleges and friends does not break my spirit as it has done to some others. I am grateful for their sacrifices. I am also terribly grateful for the sacrifices of those who survived, including those in this room.

"I made choices during this war that ultimately affected everyone. Most of you did the same." He stressed this point. "In fact, some of those choices overshadow mine so greatly, that I am amazed and humbled to realize that we all owe _you_ our lives and our respect, and our love." His gaze fell upon Draco. The boy had just looked up, his eyes visibly watery from the head table.

Snape's own words weighed heavily on his heart. He said more than he had planned to. He requested that the room stand and observe a moment of silence, to recognize those losses from the war. The moment turned into five minutes. When the sound of idle feet shuffling reached his ears, he cleared his throat. All motion ceased.

"Let the sorting begin." Severus announced.

The group of first year students was larger than usual making up for the lost year, but that wasn't what bothered Harry. They were all scared. Not knowing what Hogwarts was like before the war, they seemed to think that evil was still lurking around the corners. He felt sorry for them. Hogwarts was still a warmly magical place, so they should get settled in before long.

Harry wasn't entirely surprised to find Snape as the new Headmaster. The potions master was an authoritive person. After showing his true colors in the war, it seemed fitting, at least to Harry, that Severus take up the position. No one else qualified wanted the position, so no one argued with the Ministry's decision. After the sorting, Snape introduced the new staff to the students.

Harry was glad to see that not all the new teachers were unfamiliar faces. Oliver Wood had filled in Snape's previous position as the Potions Instructor, while also filling the vacancy for Head of Gryffindor. Harry found this news incredibly uplifting. With Oliver as Head of Gryffindor, the house would be just like the house's Quidditch team when Wood had been team captain.

Some old wizard from the Ministry of Magic had been appointed Head of Slytherin, and took over the Defense against the Dark Arts class. Hootch and Trelawny had taken over head of house positions for Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff, respectively.

There was also, Amelia bones. She agreed to teach Charms for this year, relinquishing her Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement position to someone more willing to deal with the huge increase in work load. It was rumored that she in fact failed to act quickly during the war, and stepped down believing she was now unfit for that position.

Harry didn't pay attention to the rest of what was said. He looked over to where the Malfoy sat and realized that the blond Slytherin sat alone. It wasn't that his two sidekicks were no longer a presence; it was simply that no one sat beside him at all. The rest of the Slytherin table was full. The other boy was silent, and staring blankly down at the table top in front of him.

_Those grey eyes_.

Suddenly the food appeared and the meal had begun, much to the astonishment of the new students! Almost as sudden, Draco left the Slytherin table and promptly ignored the food and everyone in the room. He left swiftly and soundlessly. Harry's eyes followed the young man out the door. He almost got up and followed him, but he stayed. He had an overwhelming need to help, and he wanted to. He just couldn't, not yet.

Harry took a deep breath and let himself relax. His plate of food held no interest for him. He looked around at his fellow students, they all seemed ravenous. Some even were smiling now, which was nice. Then he noticed Snape looking at him from the head table. His former potions master had lost some of his dark edge since the war, especially now. The new Head Master was looking at the Gryffindor boy with a look of understanding. He shook his head imperceivably, though Harry saw it.

Draco, more than anyone, needed time alone before anyone could help him.

**--**

That first day turned out to be anticlimactic. New students got settled in, eventually. Some of the older students took the opportunity to play pranks on them. Harry was relieved that some of his classmates still had a sense of humor, no matter how juvenile. On the whole, the pranks were mild in comparison to the havoc the Weasly twins could stir up. Inwardly, Harry chuckled at some of the pranks he remembered the most.

_No, forgetting isn't the answer,_ he told himself. _Too many _good_ memories were lost that way._

He moved through the crowded Gryffindor Common Room, towards his room when someone caught his arm. Harry whirled around with a start.

"Sorry, Harry" some boy from third or fourth year apologized. "I was told to give you this." The younger Gryffindor handed him small scroll of parchment sealed with wax. "Most of the seventh year students and some from sixth year are getting them."

Harry thanked the boy absently. He stared at the note a good minute before deciding to open it. He sat down away from most of the crowd and broke the seal. Unrolling the parchment he recognized the penmanship as belonging to his old potions teacher.

_Dear Mr. Potter,_

_you are invited to a private meeting_

_of significant importance this evening_

_on hour before midnight _

_in the Great Hall of Hogwarts._

_Please present this scroll upon your arrival._

_Your Headmaster,_

_Severus Snape_

Harry read the note once. Then suddenly the letters faded away and left only bare parchment. The note didn't bother him as much as it could have. What bothered him was it regarded 'a private meeting of significant important', and that most of the older student were getting these invitations. Of course Snape left the note as vague and mysterious as possible while being entirely direct about its purpose.

Harry was _required_ to be at the Great Hall for eleven o'clock tonight.

* * *

September-21-2005: first posted

* * *


	3. So Broken

**... _A Requiem for Sadness_ ...**

**- III -**

**So Broken**

He was trembling by the time he reached his refuge. He slipped into the unused washroom and leaned back against the door. His breathing was heavy and irregular. The boy balled his fists at his sides as muttered a short mantra under his breath.

"Stop crying. Stop crying. Stop crying." The words echoed against the tiles of the room and distorted his words. Those words came back at him as a twisted sound of agony. The tall lanky blond closed his eyes.

"Stop crying, stop crying, stopcrying, stopcring." The words began to fumble out of his mouth. He turned to the wall to his right. Both fists slammed against the stark white tiles.

"STOP IT!" Draco screamed through clenched teeth. "Stop stop STOP," he continued, while banging his fists with each word into the wall near his head. "Why-did-that-bastard…" The emotions pulsed through him, pulling at him, tearing him inside out. He was sobbing now, openly and loudly. "BLOODY HELL!" He pummeled the wall again as he cursed. A couple of the tiles were loose now, and one fell to the Slytherin's feet shattering to pieces..

"Why did he say … those things?" Draco croaked. His voice was strained.

"Crying does you good. I know from experience." A hollow voice resonated behind him.

He gritted his teeth and reached for his wand.

"Get out now." Draco growled. "I know how to banish a ghost permanently. I can send you to a place where no one will ever hear you, Myrtle – dead or alive."

"Hmpf!"

The girl's ghost took the threat seriously enough that she wasn't visible when he finally did turn around. What he did see was his reflection. He saw a tall young man reduced to tears like a little boy throwing a tantrum. His face was reddened and swollen and still producing moisture. At least he stopped sobbing like child. His body felt weak, his long arms hung at his side in defeat. _Defeated. _That is exactly how his parents looked when he betrayed them. _Betrayed._

He stared long and hard at his reflection. His grey eyes were so much like his father's when he had seen them last. Lucius had looked upon his son for the very last time full of contempt and disgust. That was the hardest blow Draco had been dealt during the war.

"I know what I did was right, father. It just feels so wrong now that it hurts. It hurts!" His voice began to rise again. He took a shaky deep breath.

"It hurts more than anything, daddy." Draco's voice cracked.

He stepped towards the mirror above the sinks. He took another step.

Draco remembered suddenly his mother's face in that final moment of her life, a life that he ended. Her fine features once so beautiful that even he loved to look at her. She had turned to him twisted with confusion, and fear. What had pulled at his heart the most was the loss of hope and the loss of love for him his mother showed in that one moment at the very end.

He saw her in him now, that delicate jaw line, the proud nose, and that stubborn mouth. Now that he was crying he looked even more like her somehow. Maybe it was how hurt she looked when he finally turned on her and father. He stepped toward the mirror again.

"I'm so sorry, mum. I never wanted to hurt you." He was only a few steps away from the mirror now. "It hurts so much."

Another step.

"It hurts too much." Tears began to well up in his eyes again. He leaned and grabbed the edge of the sink while not looking away from what he was in the mirror. His fingers gripped hard enough that his knuckles turned white.

In a flash, something surfaced in his mind. His body tensed suddenly. His grip on the sink loosened it noticeably. He pulled. The sinks in this washroom were old, the plumbing didn't really work. As it was the taps in here were in the wall not in the sink itself. So when Draco yanked on it a second time the fixture actually came loose from both the wall and the drain pipe.

The blond teen staggered backwards a step and stared blankly at what he now held in his hands, a little shocked.

Draco looked back into the mirror with a hardened expression now. He took another step back and hefted the sink above his head.

"Fuck love." He told himself.

Shattered glass and cracked porcelain exploded, spilling shards around his feet and across the floor in all directions. His shoes crunched with each step as he turned and left.

"Fuck everything."

* * *


	4. I Go Humble

**... _A Requiem for Sadness_ ...**

**- IV -**

**I Go Humble**

He watched Draco leave the Great Hall. Many of the students ignored him, barely acknowledging his presence. Snape had noticed the vacant seats around the boy. It made him angry, that the students would treat the young Malfoy like this. He had sacrificed everything for our side. He had killed his parents. Did they not know what that could _do_ to a person?

Snape glanced at Mr. Potter, the one that probably got all the attention. The young Gryffindor had watched Draco leave too. Normally that wouldn't have bothered Severus. It was Harry's eyes, and body language bothered him, though. Everything about the boy that moment told him that he wanted to go after the Slytherin and help the boy. He knew that Draco needed time to himself, and a lot of it. He also knew that after some time that emotionally stricken young man will need a friend, one that he could count on under any situation. That is usually a tall order to fill, but somehow Snape figured that Harry had what it took.

The youth's eyes found the new Headmaster's.

_Yes. You may be exactly what he needs, Mr. Potter. But give him time, please._

After their yes broke contact, Snape realized something. The one boy that received most of the attention right now was the one boy who ignored them all and sat alone as well. Instead Harry had been concerned with Draco, and had acknowledged his presence to some degree.

_Perhaps Draco will be what you need as well, in time._

The new Headmaster of Hogwarts reflected on these insights during the rest of the meal. By the end he had made the decision to set in motion an idea he had been dwelling on since coming to this position.

**--**

After sending off about two dozens notes to thoses students that had been heavily involved during the last battle, Snape sat back and surveyed his new office. These quarters had been partially damaged, but it looked virtually identical to that of Dumbledore's office. It was the same space of course, but more over, it felt like Dumbledore still occupied this space.

_It's going to take a lot of getting used to, that's for sure._

The only noticeable changes were that Fawks' cage was gone. The Phoenix had vanished the moment Dumbledore perished, leaving an empty cage lightly dusted with ashes. A few of Albus' personal possessions had been removed and put safely away. Aside from a few other changes, the room hadn't changed at all.

Suddenly the rest of his life flashed breifly before his eyes.

He was now the Headmaster of Hogwarts. His responsibilities now included the well being of hundreds of students, and dozen or so teachers, the castles and surrounding grounds, the innumerable house elves that were bound to this place as well as any other staff. Secondarily, it included relations with the parents and families of each of the students, and then maintaining a report with the Ministry of Magic and its affiliates. On top of all that, this would be continuous work, ongoing for as long as he held this position.

"First thing's first." He said aloud. He began drawing up a formal request to the Ministry regarding his idea. He would be sending this via Priority Owl directly to the Prime Minister of Magic himself. Snape had previously spoken to the man about the idea off the record. He seemed interested enough to give it thought. Now the man will have an official request to consider! Severus had a good feeling about this.

Once that was finished and sent off. He had a few moments to himself before dealing with other matters.

His thoughts turned to Draco once again. If it hadn't have been for that boy, so many things would be different now. Someone else would have been Headmaster. In fact there might not have been a Hogwarts left at all to be Headmaster of. And of course, his plan to snare the higher ranking Death Eaters would have failed utterly.

He had played both sides for so long; he almost forgot what it was like to go beyond the call of duty. He lived so long doing what was required of both sides balancing out the two.

One night things changed. Draco had come to him. The boy was sick and tired of living his father's dream, in his shadow and the shadow of the Dark Lord himself. Draco showed him the way, by taking initiative. The boy had enough courage to talk to him about his feelings. He took the initiative in asking for help. Snape marveled at this idea.

Then it came to him. If he were to take the initiative and take any action to prevent or win this war, it would not be for Voldemort's cause. If he did anything to help either side win, it was for the 'good' side. Draco helped him see this. Once he realized this, he and Draco became each other's support. The moment Snape was aware of Voldemort's final plan he and Draco set out on a risky and treacherous course of action.

Only on that day did he realize what a test of faith and strength of character it was for him and Draco both.

Severus had so much to be thankful for now. He never had that before.

* * *

September-25-2005: First posted

* * *


	5. Unravel

**... _A Requiem for Sadness_ ...**

**- V -**

**Unravel**

Once Harry put away his things he sat on his bed. He absently stroked his new pet while he rummaged through the mass of thoughts in his head. During the war he had lost his owl Hedwig, and though he never thought to replace his beloved owl having his new pet helped him out immensely, especially when he had no one to talk to.

The cat was found in the aftermath of one of the few open attacks the Death Eaters made on muggles. Harry had visited the site only because it had targeted his muggle family, and he paid his respects by surveying the damage the area had suffered and helping with cleaning the area up. Harry had heard a noise near his foot. Underneath a fallen branch in a small depression in the ground, the kitten had been trapped for days. Bloody and starving, it had been a poor sight. Those wide frightened amber eyes had won him over at once.

Harry looked at the animal purring next to him. Finding a name had been terribly difficult. Harry liked cats enough, but he never thought himself a cat lover. Also, the cat was long haired and black – a beautiful yet ominous creature. At first this made Harry nervous. He had grown up with the superstition that black cats were a bad sign. When the cat healed from his injuries it was obvious. The cat's fur turned a brilliant white where his scars had healed, and one such marking lay just above its right eye.

Harry chuckled as he remembered when he had first heard someone refer to his pet as The Cat Who Lived, although it had been terribly annoying at the time! No, he had finally decided on a name, a name taken from his family that seemed all too fitting.

"Sirius." He called softly. The feline answered with a big yawn, showing his long white fangs before snapping his jaw shut. Sirius then proceeded to ignore Harry and clean himself once again.

"Harry." A quiet voice called.

Harry whipped around and gaped at the person standing in the doorway.

"Ron!"

The redhead looked emaciated, but much better than he had looked the last time Harry visited him, no more than a week ago. Harry jumped off his bed and welcomed Ron with a light, friendly hug.

_He's still so thin!_

"When did you get in?"

"Just now. That bloody Granger decided that missing the first day was the end of the world." Ron voice was quiet, but had more life now.

"Herm is here?"

"In the common room waiting." Ron lifted up something he had in his hand. It was the same note that Harry received.

"I don't know what Snape wants, so don't ask."

"Snape… as Headmaster… I reckon I'll have to get used to that!"

Fighting the urge to rush down to meet Hermione, Harry stayed and took his friend's shoulders.

"So, you're doing better?" Ron looked away. His eyes became distant for a moment. Harry couldn't even tell if the other was breathing.

"I don't know." He whispered. "I don't think about it… well, I try not to."

Silence hung around them for a moment. Ron shifted uncomfortably.

"You know what?" Harry asked. Before Ron could answer Harry wrapped his arms around his friend once more, this time more urgently. "I've really missed you!"

"I… uhh… I missed you too" Ron's arms encircled Harry's torso in return. Ron sniffed once during the embrace. After another moment of silence Ron spoke.

"You think we can... " Ron swallowed, "you know… stop acting like girls now?"

"Err, right!"

They let each other go.

"Boys!" Hermione exclaimed breathily from somewhere behind Ron. She stepped up between them with glistening eyes. The girls' arms snaked around the two of them at once.

"Oh, blimey rotten hell!" Ron cursed.

**--**

When the trio approached the doors to the Great Hall, no one was in sight.

"See! Why did you drag us here early?" Ron whined.

"Oh, don't be such a brat. Being early is better than being late. And being on time is useless unless you plan to arrive precisely at an exact time, which is astronomically improbable."

Harry chuckled while Ron made a face. It felt so good being with the two of them again, almost like old times.

Just then the doors parted.

"Miss Granger, and Mr. Weasly… How wonderful to see the both of you. I only heard of you arrival a moment ago." Snape regarded them pleasantly. "Mr. Potter, and you two may enter. It seems that some of those invited are indeed anxious."

Behind the Headmaster a couple of students had already arrived and were sitting among a small group of chairs in the middle of the Hall – much to Hermione's chargin! Harry, Ron and Hermione each provided their invitations, now blank, to Snape, and entered the hall. As they came closer, they recognized the other students.

Cho Chang sat with Dean Thomas and the Patil girls. There was also Nevile Longbottom who looked up and saw the trio first. Pansy Parkinson and Markus Flint were the only ones from Slytherin and made no fuss at all over the newcomers. Hannah Abbot seemed to staring off at nothing at all. Justin Finch-Fletchley gave a polite wave. Luna Lovegood sat alone keeping an eye on everyone.

Lavendar Brown and Seamus Finnigan, came in shortly after Harry and his friends sat down. Ernie MacMillan arrived a few minutes before the allotted hour. Zacharias Smith arrived a few minutes late, looking rushed and seemed worried about any possible punishment that might ensue from the new Headmaster.

"Please have a seat, Mr. Smith. We are expecting a few more students still." Soon after, the rest of the chairs filled with more students. After some time no one else showed up. Harry noticed that Snape was pacing slowly around the group. As the Headmaster made a pass behind where he, Ron and Hermioine sat an empty chair caught his attention.

_He's expecting someone else._

Suddenly Harry knew who it was. He watched Snape come around the other side of the group and stop. He was staring at the door.

"You're late, Mr. Malfoy." All the gathered students turned. Draco sneered at them all. His blond hair was somewhat disheveled and his face was reddened. He wore a heavy full length robe.

"I had just read your… invitation… only a moment ago." His voice was oddly low and calm. He looked away from Snape and spied the empty chair. "And don't call me that ever again."

A chill ran down Harry's spine, and by the looks on everyone's face they all felt it too. For a long second the room lost all its warmth. Draco grabbed the chair and pulled away from the group before sitting down. Ron muttered something under his breath.

Snape cleared his throat to signal the beginning of the meeting as much as to quiet those before him.

"Since I have gathered you all here at this late hour on your first day back, which has been undoubtedly long, I shall be brief." Severus stepped into a break in the circle of students before continuing.

"Since coming to this position, I have faced many dilemmas. I won't bore you all with the details, but I will tell you that an idea came to me a short while ago that would help with more than one of the issues. I have just received confirmation from the Ministry of Magic of its support on this regard.

"I am initiating a new program that will, under normal circumstances, be offered to only seventh year students. However, for this inaugural year, I am allowing all of you in this group the choice of participating."

Snape studied some of the faces before him. Most were curious, others were wary.

"To put yourself at ease, your decision is just that – your decision. You can choose freely, and make that choice based on whatever reasons you may."

"Get on with it! Tell us of your new program before we miss our first classes," Grumbled a voice from behind Harry. Snape threw an icy glare over Harry's head at Draco. Yet he said nothing to the Slytherin.

"I would like all of you to participate in Hogwarts' first Wizard to Muggle exchange program. For a portion of your school year you may live in a designate muggle community and live as Muggles while continuing most of your studies–"

A bark of laughter startled everyone even Snape. The riotous mirth erupted from the blond boy behind Harry and his friends.

"THAT is your new program?" Draco stood up.

"That it is… Draco." Snape voiced evenly.

"You and your _great_ plans! What is this one supposed to accomplish? Reveal us to the muggles so that they can start coming to Hogwarts like it was some vacation getaway?"

"Actually _Draco_, it's supposed to do the exact opposite." Snape stepped towards the rebellious youth, who was now right behind Harry.

"This program will allow seventh year students, more specifically _you_ students a reprieve from these halls, as, I'm sure you don't need reminding, they hold many, many memories – some very horrific!

I specifically choose you, this group of students, so that each one of you may take advantage of the time away… to mend broken spirits and perhaps morn the passing of loved ones in _peace_."

Snape's voice boomed over Harry's head. In its absence the only sound was of Draco's labored breathing from behind and some nervous movements from other students. The room was not only cold now, but incredibly tense. Harry was shivering. He wanted to be anywhere but between Snape and Malfoy, but to move would most likely mean drawing all the tension towards him. Time ticked away slowly before anything happened.

"You'll have a couple of weeks to think about this, in the meantime if you have any questions or concerns please come see me."

Draco huffed and stomped off out the door. As he whirled towards the entrance, a rush of air swept passed Harry. He detected a faint mix of odors. Out of the mélange, Harry picked out something akin to a fragrant wine.


	6. Pagan Poetry

**... _A Requiem for Sadness_ ...**

**- V -**

**Pagan Poetry**

"I thought I was going to _die_ in there!" Hermione gasped as they entered the Gryffindor common room.

"You thought _you_ were going to die?" Harry criticized. "What about me? I felt like I was a cornered animal!" He shivered as he sat down in front of the fire place. Hermione sat next to him. Ron sank into a large chair off to the side. Harry stared at the dancing flames, glad to feel the heat they gave off. Ron tried to stifle a succession of yawns. Hermione watched Harry.

"I have to say," Granger began breathily, "that this exchange program is entirely unexpected. It's unprecedented really, at least in Hogwarts history. I think it's a smart move for Snape, though. I mean he's new to this and he really needs to make his mark with the position, lest everyone believe he's just a shoddy replacement for Dumbledore, Merlin-bless-him. And with the War over and done with, he can make a new future with Hogwarts!"

Ron cleared his throat. "Too much talk, and not enough sleep. I'm going to bed. Goodnight."

Hermione bid him a good night, and Harry pulled his attention from the flames and did the same.

"Bed sounds nice right about now. See you in the morning Harry." The girl gave Harry's arms a squeeze. He returned it with a smile.

"Goodnight Herm. It's great to see you again." She smiled, his eyes following her as she left the room. He suffered a long and drawn out yawn before getting up himself and making his own way to bed.

**--**

Draco had taken a bottle of _Wizengottington's Special: Mulberry, Blackberry & Dragonberry Wine_ and found a secluded perch in a window of one of the higher towers of the castle. He had finished the bottle well within an hour, and he spent another wishing he had brought the other four he had smuggled into the school with him. Then that blasted Slytherine boy found him. He almost ignored the summons, but thought against it. Through muddled senses he could tell, so he thought, that this was a serious request of his presence.

Now he knew better.

Now he was fuming.

Now, more than ever he needed somewhere to go.

Draco had never expected his return to school to be so strenuous, however this first day had been truly taxing on his resolve. Seeing the school restored to its former glory was merely irritating. He liked Hogwarts enough, though most of the people here he didn't care for. Watching as students steer clear, even fellow Slytherins, crushed him. They had no idea how much they owed him, for the sacrifices he made. Having Snape, the new Headmaster and his godfather, speak to the whole school about the War and the loss of _loved_ ones, stung as much as each word could have been a slap. Also, to have Severus and that – that savior Potter – look at him with sympathy or concern or with any feeling at all was maddening! He was not some sulking child that suffered the loss of a pet or toy! No! Didn't they understand? He lost everything…

_Nothing really matters._

Now, Snape hatches this silly plan. When will he stop? If this was a sign of things to come, Draco didn't want to be involved. He needed to escape this madness.

The blond Slytherin was crossing his house's common room on the way to his room when a thought struck him so soundly that he froze in his tracks.

A memory surfaced in his mind. It was a memory of his father talking to him, and telling him about a spell. The spell was a long forgotten one. His father used it once or twice when he needed an escape to put all of his thoughts in order. It was very dangerous to use this spell without some precautions, he father had said. Draco didn't remember what precautions were needed, but he remembered the spell – or what Lucius had told him, rather.

Suddenly energized, Draco fled the common room heading to his room. He closed the door behind him in a rush. He threw off his thick cloak and heavy robes and climbed onto his bed. He then pulled the heavy black drapes closed around his bed leaving the inside in total darkness.

"Lumos!" Draco's wand glowed at the tip.

The Slytherin breathed deeply and thought about what he was going to do. It was odd that he remembered this, the memory was an old one. Somehow it stayed with him. The only reason Draco could think of was that the spell sounded like strange poetry to his ears. Trying to remember the exact words was difficult but running through the spell in his head helped. He also remembered that to perform it correctly the words of the spell had to be said slowly with rhythm, and forcefully too.

"Silentium," the boy uttered, casting a silencing charm around him.

For the longest time he just knelt there on his bed holding out his wand which spread a pale green light over him. Soon his arm began to tremble. He brought his other hand up and used both hands to hold his wand up. A bead of sweat trickled from his brow past the corner of his eye and down over his cheek. Another bead snaked its way down his throat around his Adam's apple and then soaked into the collar of his shirt. A third slide down the line of his nose and dripped onto his upper lip. He tested the saltiness of it when he licked his lips.

It was some time before he realized his blurred vision was from tears pooling in his eyes. When he blinked them away they streaked down his cheeks mixing with his sweat.

_I need to get away from here! I have to… go away…_

Finally he made up his mind. Taking a deep breath he recalled the words and they waited at the tip of his tongue.

"_Ambivium Respicio  
Peragro Sententia  
Speculum Revolvo  
Aspicio nam Umbra"_

Nothing happened right at first. Then, by the glow of his wand, a series of things took place in rapid succession.

Then he heard himself scream.


End file.
